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Tuesday, October 10, 2006
haiz...
am i someone who gives only empty promises?
someone who gives nothing but troubles?
someone who gives nothing but miseries?
someone who is incapable of anything?
someone who gives nothing but hopeless hopes?
someone who harms people around me?
someone who is that useless?
can somebody please help me?
can somebody just hide me somewhere?
just prevent me to be found and stop causing troubles, empty promises, miseries, hopeless hopes and harm?
i feel so helpless...
i'm losing myself...
i can no longer recognise myself...
i just want an escape...
but i have to face it...
please...................can someone just hide me?
i hate myself...
never confident about myself again....
i'm just that bad and useless....
-Stay with me;
8:20:00 PM
Sunday, October 01, 2006
wow...it has been such a long time since i've blogged...so sorry...
hahas...
so much had happened..but i didnt blog anything about it at all..
yah...after prelims..and i've gotten my results..
i've improved..
but, still didnt manage to meet kok leong's standard..
anyway...there's a limit to everything right?
but i'll definately push myself harder de....
and...that day...our sch celebrated mid-autumn..
i performed..
but i was really not satisfied with my own performance...
reasons being, i was too nervous and i didnt really practised...
anyway...i still gained valuable experience...
yesterday i was thinking...izit possible that we stop quarrelling?
cuz if we stop quarrelling...we'll have more happy times..
i really hate those times when i make him sad...
i feel like i've failed....
one of my philosophies inlife is actually to make everyone around me happy..
however..i know it's difficult..
but...never say die always say try right?
there's always a way to make pple smile...
maybe just that i haven thought of the ways ba..
haha..
it's okay..i can always fnd out slowly if i try...
right?
Aja aja fighting!!!! lolx...
anyway...i've been talking to celine recently...
and cleared out some of her thoughts and dilemma...
i'm very happy today when she said she always liked talking to me..
hahas...
i feel so happy.....
then i was helping her or rather giving her suggestions abt sth..
haha
oh ya..and abt my b'day...
my dad brought in a new member to our family...Kitty..
she's not a cat wor..
she's a dog...
must be puzzled why i gave her this name right?
haha...
cuz i tot....if i put the word "Hello" in front..
her name will be Hello Kitty...
haha...
okay..i know it's very bad of me to give this name to her..
but it's cute...isn't it?
when i told celine this...
she said i'm a funny person..
hahaha..
and i must admit..she's very funny also..
she thought of giving her music school this name - Woohoo~ Sch of perf arts
haha...
then it'll be like..
"let's put our hand together to welcome Team Woohoo!!!" (aplause)
hahahaha....
she even tot that...when introducing..
the word Woohoo must have that punch and in singsong method..
haha..
she's really funny yea?
lolx...
yah...and i'm learning harmony for my lesson recently..
it's tough...but fun
haha...
and i'm very very happy and contented that my dear dear actually accompanied me for my lesson...
i'm so blessed right?
haha...
yah..
that's why i'm treasuring...
haha....yupps..
opps...got to go..
a really very vey long post for today..
maybe just to make up for not posting for such a long time ba..
hahas..
sorry once again =P
~Lilian
-Stay with me;
10:32:00 PM